Alright – so by now you should have read the primer to today’s post. If not, here’s the link to the first in the installment of Oral Sex Mastery Posts (The Basics). Make sure to check it out and get a good foundational understanding of what it means to deliver amazing oral sex – once you’re comfortable with the basics, read on.
This is where things get fun and really start to heat up. It’s also where you’ll begin to differentiate yourself from the normal shmuck who noodles around down there on a woman and never really understands what he’s doing.
Your ability to escalate and perform some of these more advanced moves really is dependent on her level of arousal. The more she’s into it, the more she’ll be comfortable with you ramping things up – and as you perform those next moves, she’ll continue to become more turned on and you’ll enter the awesome-zone.
But how do you read her? There are a few pretty easy-to-observe signals that you’re doing something right:
- Her breathing – listen for changes in her breathing: quick, sharp shallow breaths are a good sign, and so is her holding her breath for a few moments followed by a big deep breath/sigh. Basically any noticeable change in her breathing pattern means she’s focusing heavily on whatever you’re doing, and that’s a good thing. Thumbs up, good sir.
- Moaning – this one is kind of obvious, but the list wouldn’t be complete without it. If she’s moaning, you’re on your way- duh.
- Body movement – if you’re properly stimulating her incredibly sensitive clitoris / overall v-town zip code, she won’t be able to help squirming and gyrating her body. This sort of body movement also means she’s embracing the experience and “letting go” – a great sign of success and an indicator she’ll likely be ok with you intensifying the stimulation.
Light the Fire:
In my previous post in this series I discussed the need to go slow and warm her up before attempting any oral stimulation. Once you have done that, it’s time to go in. Again, I’m going to advise that you take it slowly and use the lightest of touches. If she’s craving it because of you erogenous zone work, giving her only a light touch will drive her crazy. A good trick that will help you keep this in mind is The Flame:
- Imagine the tip of your tongue is a flickering flame
- Using light, semi rapid “flicks” of your tongue on and around her clitoris
- Vary speed slightly, but always keep the degree of touch very light
Eat Some Ice Cream:
After you’ve teased her sufficiently with the Flame Technique, you should transition into a more normalized degree of touch – similar to how you would eat an ice cream cone. You don’t slam your tongue into your ice cream do you? No, because you would knock it off the cone, maybe onto your shoe, which would then get all sticky, and that’s how you get ants. No one likes ants, and women don’t like your stupid tongue style battering ram technique, so drop it k? k.
Disclaimer – some women might like that – but let’s continue to play the percentages here and assume that most do not like it.
Another good analogy that will help you keep the whole oral sex thing in perspective is to treat it as though you’re making out with her. Use your tongue and lips in a similar fashion to how you would kiss her mouth. Use varying amounts of pressure when you kiss and lick the outer parts of her vagina, and you can even use your tongue for some shallow penetration. Now some of you may think “is it cool to playfully nibble like I might on her bottom lip while kissing?” The answer my friend, is an unequivocal and deafening FUCK – NO. That works well while making out, but when we’re talking extremely sensitive areas like her vagina, keep your teeth to yourself.
Bonus: If you need a refresher on how to be amazing at making out, check out my free e-book (download link at the end of this post)
This sort of goes hand in hand with the previous point – but merits its own bullet. A lot of dudes will devote their attention to the clit and or other obvious hot zones like the g spot, and that’s fine. However, remember that her entire vagina is incredibly sensitive and varying stimulation from one place to another can feel amazing for her. A great move to mix things up and keep her guessing is to pay attention to her labia minora: while you’re licking her (remember – ice cream), take a second and suck gently on her left labia and tug a little on it – then return to licking her normally and alternate to the right labia. It may sound a little different, but that’s the point – you want to be different and better than everyone else. This move will feel awesome.
Use Your Head:
This one is great. Any guy knows that tongue/neck fatigue is a real thing when performing oral on your gal. Again, read the first post in this series for some tips/techniques on how to mitigate this problem with some creative body positioning (link here). Aside from using these techniques, though, there are some other things you can do to give yourself a break and allow yourself to last longer when performing oral – one of which I’ll refer to as “using your head”.
Don’t just dive right into this move- you’ll want to make sure she’s well warmed up by using some of the techniques I’ve already touched on. When she’s ready, create some suction on the area around her clit and bring it all up into your mouth. Tuck your teeth behind your lips to make sure you’re not using any hard/sharp surfaces on her. Once you’ve drawn her up and have control of her with your mouth and lips, gently move your head side to side, bringing with it her clit that’s now in your mouth. When done correctly, you’ll be using no tongue (give it a rest) but still providing amazing stimulation for her. Because you’re not stimulating her clit directly you can play with the direction, speed and force of this move pretty freely. As she becomes more turned on, she’ll be open to a more firm approach in terms of the amount of suction and the speed you use, but keep it light at first if you’re not sure.
Alright guys – those are some solid intermediate moves to add to your oral sex game toolbox. Once your comfortable with the basics and the tips above, we’ll talk about layering the final level – the advanced stuff to send her over the top. Until then, re-read this, commit it to memory and put it into action.
Let me know if you have any questions on anything you’ve read here.